Friday, March 30, 2012

Oh Commonwealth of Virginia, you so crazy........

By: Daryl "FillYaFullOfLead" Northrop

Found out a fun fact about the Commonwealth of Virginia. Wait. Commonwealth? Common-Wealth? Sounds like socialism to me. But we'll save that for another post.

Anyhow, back to the fun fact about Virginia. Many states have concealed weapons permit laws, meaning, you legally buy a handgun, apply for a concealed weapons permit, and then can carry the gun under your jacket, or in an ankle-holster, or under your mullet, or whatever. Right? Right. 2nd amendment, bishes! Here in the lovely land of Virginia, concealed weapons permits are pretty easy to get.

But what if getting one of those permits is just too much gosh darned work?! Virginia has a solution for that as well. For we are an....drum roll please.......OPEN CARRY STATE. "What is that?" you might be asking as you swill mango-tini's in your posh dwelling, you liberal elitist, you. The open carry laws stipulate that as long as you are: over 21, not a felon, and have most of your teeth (ok, made that one up), you can carry a pistol in a firearm on your hip, or slung over your shoulder, right out in the open, unconcealed, and this is perfectly ok and legal.

Yes, you read that right.

It is completely legal. In fact, it's encouraged here. (Ok, made that up as well, but it's not discouraged either.) So in that spirit, I am going to embrace my rights under the open-carry law, but with some style. Anybody can be a 9mm semi-automatic pistol. But I was thinking of going old school, like a BLUNDERBUSS! Hell yeah. I'm thinking something like this:

***Note to self: Grow massive beard.

And for the ladies, you can be uber-stylish and feminine with your open-carry blunderbuss-based outfit as well!

***Massive beard not included, and not encouraged. Ew.