Monday, October 24, 2011

Do you work in an office? Yay! You're screwed!

By: Daryl

Hello fellow mouth-breathers.

Do you work in an office? So do I!!!! We're cubicle buddies! We make "TPS Report" jokes from the late 90's still sound fresh as they did 4 years ago when they were still pretty damn old.

As you may know, offices have "problems" such as: IT systems that do not work, or other employees that do not work, or employees who work very hard at wasting the time of other employees actually trying to do work. So, what is management to do? Do they:

  1. Clearly address the issue and give firm guidance (heh. 'Firm.' *giggle*)?
  2. Make prudent investments in computer and network technology and other shiny electronic boobs?
  3. Ruthlessly discipline the aforementioned malcontent employees?
Good lord, NO! What do you think this is, Star Trek?

What is usually done is to reshuffle the deck. This consists of moving teams from the control of one VP to another. Because this makes a huge difference. Yep. Huge. Like you mom's meatloaf. To drive this point home, I have included this handy deck of cards/slab of meat picture. Why? Because it's my blog, that's why! And, it visually represents the deck of cards/meat analogies I am using. Or are they metaphors. Fuck, I don't know. I'm no east coast elitist. GO GWU COLONIALS! BUFF AND BLUE ONWARD TO VICTORY, AND THEN SCONES!!!

And now, the picture.

Pretty awesome right? And just so you know, you're looking at my meat. That's right. Gaze longingly at it. Meaty.

1 comment:

  1. I feel like I have a comment, if only I understood the meat analogy.